☕ teacups and tiny victories ✌
Hi there, lovely humans!
I’m Urmila-writer, artist, educator, accidental IT professional, certified yogi, and your friendly neighbourhood creativity coach.
My life might look like a delightful mash-up of random passions (teaching! tech! art! yoga!), but it all comes down to one thing: helping people connect with their authentic selves and live more meaningful lives.
On this Substack, I mix storytelling, mindfulness, and a dash of creative alchemy to explore emotional wellness, personal growth, and the joy of embracing imperfection.
This Substack is called Teacups and Tiny Victories because it’s like an intimate chat over tea with a close friend- you know, the kind where we celebrate *all* wins, big or small, whether they’re personal breakthroughs or little sparks of joy in the world. Every Monday, I send you an article to make those dreaded Mondays just a little brighter- and maybe even a little magical.
If this sounds like your cup of tea (pun intended!), stick around. Oh, and if my musings spark even a tiny bit of inspiration, consider
It keeps the creative engines humming (and the caffeine flowing). Thanks for being here; your presence makes this journey infinitely sweeter ❤️✨
Giving Yourself Creative Permission Is the Ultimate Act of Rebellion
The Crack of External Validation
If I look back on why I started drawing as a kid because I wanted to please my parents. Being a single child, external validation is like crack. And I used to get high on it every time I topped my class, drew something like life, colored within the lines.
This is what you call generational conditioning. It is strong, pungent and intrinsic like that onion breath you get. You know it’s there, others can smell it, you can’t shake it off, and no amount of mouthwash fixes it.
The “Art Police” in My Life
Whenever I would show an elder, they always had a comment. Maybe the proportions were off, or the colors went off the lines, or didn’t seem realistic.
Did I ever see a masterpiece from them? A big fat hypocrite NO.
I used to copy my favorite comic and cartoon characters with painstaking detail. I loved it. But I was told it didn’t count as real art because I was copying.
So I learned early: if it wasn’t original and approved by someone older than me, it didn’t matter. I was also always fed that narrative that you need to practice, have patience. Two things I hate to date.
Conditioning Never Left Me (Even When I Did)
I left home when I was 18, but the conditioning never did. This is not a blame game but a reflection of how our circumstances shape who we become, and why every individual should evaluate themselves if they are eligible to be parents.
You pass down your fears, your traumas, and your limiting beliefs like heirlooms wrapped in guilt paper
My fear kept me tethered to a boring teaching job. But somewhere in there, rebellion was brewing. My refusal to cover my tattoos at work, or clean up my lines for an exhibition those were tiny acts of defiance against conformity, rules, and the factory settings society tries to push us toward.
That made me the “cool teacher”, but a pretty boring artist. Because deep down, I never truly permitted myself to be either.
The Goal-Oriented Curse
I tempered my rebellion by switching mediums constantly. I had long-term flings with everything from watercolor to digital art. But my goal-oriented, conditioned brain hated that. I wasn’t sticking to one thing, and that meant I couldn’t “master” anything. I was frustrated. Not because I didn’t enjoy it, but because I wasn’t getting the results I thought I should.
During those years of jumping between media, I lost the joy of creating for myself, or maybe I never even knew what that felt like. Because all I ever did was create for approval. For publishing. For exhibiting. Never just for me.
What Always Fascinated Me
What always fascinated me was seeing other artists play in their sketchbooks. There was something so endearing about imperfect lines, messy margins, and that vulnerability that comes with trying something new. The excitement of not knowing how it would turn out? That was magic.
But me? Over 10 years as an artist, I had exhibitions, publications, media features, but never that pure joy of making something just for me. Something I would create in my leisure time, just for my eyes.
Chasing validation had gotten so bad that every time I made something, I immediately thought: How will this look on the feed?
So I stopped making analogue art altogether. Too much hassle to take a photo, edit, and post. Digital was seamless but soulless. Dependent on battery life and the fickle will to create.
Let’s not forget the torrid love triangle between the undo button and my inner critic. They were married. And they were miserable together. Which made me miserable too.
Art Was Supposed to Be My Escape
Art was supposed to be my side hustle, my vent, my canvas for self-expression, and my medium of agency. But somewhere along the way, it became another performance.
Then came 2025. I made a vision board. Decided to go all in on my book. And finally, make art for fun. But honestly? I didn’t even know what that meant until I went on this trip across Thailand. It was like the Eat, Pray, Love trip for my creativity.
The way I documented the trip? Think of a millennial swiping right on someone on Tinder/Bumble/Hinge (whatever they use these days) and wondering if it’ll work. And guess what? We’re still going strong. About two months in. Fingers crossed.
I kept it private at first, like any cautious millennial ghosting their intuition. Only when I was sure it wasn’t a fling did I share it with the world. And y’all? Y’ALL LOVED IT. Some even said you wanted to try it yourselves..
P.S.: We are still talking about illustrated journaling/ sketchnoting:)
What changed?
I let go and kept an open mind. I packed a mini sketchbook and four colors. No pressure. No expectations. Just the intention to document. I didn’t take any classes or watch tutorials. I didn’t take any classes/courses to learn the ropes, because I had enough ropes being a neck noose for my creativity.
I worked with my preferences. We moved around a lot, so it had to be portable. I liked finishing something that didn’t make me gag. I mixed writing, doodles, observations, and humor the parts of me that felt authentic.
I made it personal. This was a space where only I mattered. No likes. No comments. No metrics. Only when I fell in love with the process did I share it. By then, external opinions didn’t hold weight anymore.
I stayed open to change. If next month I get bored with this style? I won’t punish myself. I’ll celebrate the time we had together and the memories we made. Yes, we are still talking about illustrated journaling.
Life and Creativity
Funny how this mirrors life. Sometimes your rebellion, your decision to do something just for you, without waiting for permission, is the ultimate act of self-love. And you owe it to your creativity to give it an honest shot.
You have got to see the joy that this whole process was! Hopefully, it inspires you to fall in love with creating something for yourself.
Want to Try It With Me?
🎨 WORKSHOP ANNOUNCEMENT!!
"Noticing the World Around You: Drawing to Reflect & Remember"
This Friday at 4:30 PM HKT, I’m hosting a live illustrated journaling session, no art skills required, just your curiosity and an open mind.
We’ll doodle, laugh, and indulge in the art of noticing, exploring how drawing can help us observe, reflect, and remember what matters.
This is for writers, thinkers, and creatives who want to notice more, reflect better, and tell stories visually.
The first session is free! This will be a 4-part series by the end of which we should be on the same page:)
Learn how to simplify faces, poses, and emotions
Create expressive characters in minutes
Make your own illustrated journal spreads
Use sketchnoting in your writing, newsletters, or creative projects
If you’d like to join us, drop your name and location in the subscriber chat.
Let’s make something beautiful. Or messy. Or both.
Either way, it’ll be ours.
And we all will get the happy ending we deserve- yes, we are still talking about illustrated journaling :)
You’ve hit the nail on the head here! We are so used to being judged and even judging ourselves that it zaps the fun and creativity. This is a great reflective piece and is very inspiring too, it’s got me thinking about what I say to my kids about their art!
Oufgh, this hit home! I’ve always felt lowkey broken for not sticking to one thing or being a “pro” at anything. Still kinda do. But maybe trying everything is the vibe for people like us? You never know what those twist will lead to! Happy accidents are always what shape us, cuz we had the guts to give it a shot. The most rewarding happy feeling ever!! 💛